Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot had a seizure.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

this sentence will not monkey banana pie

thumb_up thumb_down +46

There is a Mexican and a Black guy in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican, you racist bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What did one ear say to the other ear? Did you hear that?

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Wanna hear a joke? Sure Niiiiggggeeee what is the last letterThe last letter is NOT and R! Its an R. Good job honey

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do u call a black rapper who only raps about sex and money? lil wayne

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Q. What did the blak guy say to the other black guy? A. Hey.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

There are two gingerbread men in an oven and the one says " it's hot in here" the other says "holy crap it's a talking cookie!!!!!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Q: How do you learn the best break dance moves? A: I don't know. You figure it out.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

69

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Whats brown and slippery? A brown slipper.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did the white man say to the muslim? Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +38

how do you make money? you roba bank! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the other birds had taken hostage the chickens family.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's long and hard and looks like plastic? A plastic baton.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Person 1: Eric is in the hospital! I think it was those depression pills. Person 2: What did he overdose? Person 3: No he just took to much.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

what did the turkey say on thanks giving? Nothing, he's dead, we ate him!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops