How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the other birds had taken hostage the chickens family.

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what did the turkey say on thanks giving? Nothing, he's dead, we ate him!

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Person 1: Eric is in the hospital! I think it was those depression pills. Person 2: What did he overdose? Person 3: No he just took to much.

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What's long and hard and looks like plastic? A plastic baton.

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A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

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Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

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Knock-knock who's there? interrupting cow interupting cow who? moo.

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What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

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So a black man, a white man and a latina walk into a sentence that doesn't end how you expected it to.

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p p p penis. penis's are big and juicy

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Why was the man afraid of the pack of wolves? The man was blind and heard his stomach growling even though he had just eaten two buckets of KFC.

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Why was the white guy eating himself? He was a autocannibal.

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Cows go moo.

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Derpy Hooves is retarded.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

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Q: What's a Mexican's favorite sport? A: Cross Country

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to....

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How u know when ur sister have periods... Fathers dig taste like blood

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Q: what is funny today A: your parents died in a horrible car accident

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Roses are red, violets are blue and the sun is very hot

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why did the farmer cry after a phone call? he just found out his wife just died of lung cancer

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A: Knock Knock! B: Come in!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops