What is the difference between an Irishman and a plank of wood? Almost everything, including anatomy, chemical make up, mass etc

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If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb 500 , 1 to hold the lightbulb, 499 to spin the house

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general tso's broccoli

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Roses are red Violets are blue So is your face Cuz I just gagged you

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Why did the man wear a blue shirt? He didn't. He wore a green one.

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When life throws you lemons what should you do? Take cover.

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a guy walked into a bar and said "ow!"

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What's stupid and a waste of time? Anti joke .com because people on here are too ignorant and serious cuz it's not funny. It's anti joke G-Dang it. Come on seriously

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John Kerry walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says, "Hey, why the lost election?"

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milk,eggs,butter,deodorant,chocolate syrup,chile powder,dildo,bacon

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Why did the Mexican put away the Marijuana? Because he was a Police Officer

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Why is Justin Bieber gay? He prefers the companionship of homosexual relationship to that of a heterosexual one.

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What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? There are many, no human being is exactly alike.

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If you say woman really fast it sounds like make me a sandwich.

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Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice? She was making sure there was enough sugar in it in case her diabetic son was to have an attack.

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Q: What did the latino kid get for christmas? A; Nothing because he died two days before

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what did the jaguar and the girl have in common? Spots, the girl had the chicken pox

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your mamas so fat her weight is 3.14 without the decimal

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John: Hey Bill, ORANGE you in the mood to go to a Phillies game? Bill: Yes! So let's make like a banana and raise our potassium levels drastically and leave right away to beat the rush hour traffic.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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2 women were sitting quietly

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Women are definitely a full time job.. You should be paid to have them......

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Whats worse than finding a jew in you bed. Jake skellern

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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