Women.

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Like if you like big tits.

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want a balloon? yeah

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:O + :P = 69

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Why was the white guy eating himself? He was a autocannibal.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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Watch your lips.

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what did th teacher say to the student? be quiet and do our work

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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A: What do you call a Jew with only one arm on Christmas? B: An amputee.

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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Hey I just meet you And this is crazy I took bath salts Your face looks tasty

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A blind man walks into a bar

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Women's Rights.

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Person 1- your face is a stupid joke Person 2- you're right, because it's not a joke its a face

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What did the black guy, the latino guy, and the asian guy all have in common? They were all human beings

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a dyslexic man came on this website thinking it was made by his aunt Tina keoj he was sadly mistaken. it was just a bunch of jokes about dyslexic men going into bars

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Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

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Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Thats where the slaughterhouse is.

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Derpy Hooves is retarded.

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- How can you call a person, who hasn't got a left eye, a left hand and a left leg? - All right.

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Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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