What do dogs and cats have in common? They eat dog food, accept for the cat.

what do black men and vending machines have in common? neithier work and they both steal your money

what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

You have 5 $1 dollar bills. Your mom rapes you and you still have 1 $5 dollar bill.

whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

How much dirt was in a hole that was 6 feet wide and 6 feet deep? None. It's a hole.

3 dogs, a blue dog, a yellow dog, and a red dog. The owner was a man named Jeff. Now the blue dog was always sad so Jeff named him blue. The yellow dog was always scared so Jeff named him yellow. Now the red dog he was red because he had red fur, so Jeff named him red. One day when Jeff was reading his newspaper, he accidentally hit his coffee and it fell on the floor. Question: What did Jeff do? I don't know.

why did the dog go inside the church? cuz the door was open.

How many WOMEN does it take to change a light bulb? YOU ALREADY KNOW ITS GONNA BE MORE THAN ONE!

What do you call 10 black people on the moon? A problem What do you call 1000 black people on the moon? A problem What do you call the population of black people on the moon? A huge problem

2 people with ADD are playing baseball. One of them pitches to the other guy and the other guy swings his arms around, misses, then gets hit by a baseball bat. The batter then realized he was the pitcher and the other guy has gone off chasing after a bird that just flew by.

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

Who's a looser and has no friends??? Max!!! His address is 2131 HighHills Narrow...

Why did the plan crash? Because the pilot was a potato

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Well I dont think that has happened to anyone ever so I guess nothings worse.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas ? Cancer

say this really fast D I C K, C H I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, C H I CK, D I C K IF YOU CANT LIKE IT

Two Haitians walk into a bar and it collapses

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

That awkward when you adimaticlly read "moment in your head because you have seen too many of these awkward moment jokes.

Why is the sky blue? Because it is.

What do u call a short Mexican Nothing that's normal

What do you call you're mum? Depends who's reading it or just mum

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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