Like my post because I have no friends And then don't like it

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mark is mark

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Roses are red, violets are blue, Flappy Bird is no where near as annoying as you!

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Q: What did one dog say to the other dog? A: "Bitch!"

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Yo momma's so fat that when she went to Seaworld and a whale saw her, looked away, and continued on with its daily life.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream cone? Man's inhumanity to man.

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A choir boy is hit by a car outside church. Someone runs to him and says "shall I fetch the priest?" The boy starts to mumble something but quickly loses consciousness, and later dies after 16 hours in ICU.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Elephants cant jump Neither can amputees

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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what happens when two small children jump into a pool full of pedophiles? They splash around and have fun

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender asks the rabbi "why the long face?" The rabbi says "to get to the other side." Seeing the puzzled look on the bartender's face, the priest says, "orange you glad he didn't say banana?"

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How do you make a burns victim cry? You show them a mirror.

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What did the banana say to the other banana? We're both marshmallows

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had a seizure.

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Why did the kid drop his lollipop? He got hit by a bus.

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A guy walks into a bar. He's thirsty and wants a beer.

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hey bill!

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Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

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Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An Astronaut.

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This guy goes to the ball game. He waits in line at the concession stand and gets a footlong hot dog and a giant orange soda. Then he makes his way around to his section of the stadium, and works his way to his seat, which is in the center of the row. Right when he's about to take a bite of his hot dog, when he hears someone in the seats way up behind him yell "Hey! Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, and sets down his giant orange drink, stands up and turns around, scanning the crowd. Eventually he sits back down. He picks up his hot dog, picks up his giant orange drink, and is just about to take a bike when he hears it again, someone way up behind him yelling "Hey! Mike!". So, he sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, and scans the hundreds of faces in the seats behind him. After a while, he sits back down. Then, right when he's about to bite into his hot dog, he hears someone behind him yelling "Mike! Hey, Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, cups his hands around his mouth and yells as loud as he can, "My name's not Mike!"

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What's funny about the holocaust? Nothing. Whoever thinks the holocaust is funny is a dick.

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Whats the best part about 23 year olds? Theres 20 of them

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Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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