There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

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asian drivers.

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What did Roadrunner name his car? Turbo Tax.

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What did the cricket say to the bear when it entered it's den? Nothing,crickets comunicate by rubbing their back legs together to create vibrations and sound,and it cannot be understood by any other animal besides crickets.

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WHY DID THE WHITE MAN TALK TO THE BLACK MAN TO LIGHTEN HIM UP

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What did the Muslim say to the Sikh? "Hello. Lovely weather today."

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Wieners? A: Nothing. your last name is a male sex organ

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Hashtag

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your mom is so blind she cant read.

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Q: Why did the baby stop crying? A: Because it was satisfied.

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Follow the Yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road........except it's not yellow.

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DOWN

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What did God say to the snake when the Snake decided to ignore God and just give Eve the apples? Snake what are you doing? Answer me, SNAKE! SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! *DUN DUN DURUDUN! DU DU DUN! *gunshot* Moral: I just hate thumbs ups, and the comments where I omit this receives those horrible green thumbs instead of them sexy red ones, so there goes.

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What is funnier then 25 9/11

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Stephen Walking.

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

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what did the jaguar and the girl have in common? Spots, the girl had the chicken pox

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wanna hear a joke? asians with t i t s

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What's funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitch-fork

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What do you call someone who can't lose? Charlie Sheen

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if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

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Why was Jimmy upset? Someone kept pouring liquid nitrogen on him.

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A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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