Why did the dog run away from home? Because dogs are absent-minded and they don't know any better.

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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Six million.

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What's wrong with the beetles? They suck dick

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What do you call 2 tigers, a zebra, and a walrus? A small zoo full of 4 animals

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It's an elephant. Who's going to stop it?

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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Q: What did Santa give the little boy for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's not real

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Q:Whats worse than a worm in apple? A:The Holocaust. Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Were both lawyers! :D Q: What happens when you throw a purple rock in to a green river? A: It splashes

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What does the scarecrow from the wizard of oz and a zombie have in common? They both want brains.

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What does a dog do in his spare time? Lick himself.

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That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

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what do you call 6 black guys hung in a tree? a arazona wind chime

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Your dad is so bald, that a various number of people compliment him on how well shaven his head is.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay man's house. Knock knock... Who's there? The Chicken

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you've been denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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Why couldn't the man walk? Because his leg is broken.

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What do you call a retarded sheep? Whatever it's name is. There's no sense in torturing it by pointing out the disability which has made it a social outcast it's whole life.

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Kendall and Nick Fredick

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What was Hellen Keller's Dog's name? Kamikaze Go, it was the first Akita Dog in the United States.

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Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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Why are they the "living" daylights?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Becasue she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops