Whats brown and sticky? Brown glue

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after A-N-A-L

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How are friends like bananas? If you peel off their skin and eat them, they die.

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What does a Dominican and a Russian have in common... they are both thinking of a funny anti-joke to post on this site...

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Why did the kid drop his lollipop? He got hit by a bus.

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How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree? Get a ladder and help her down.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Then a chair. Then a table. (TD)

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man was playing with his little toddler. the man put his thumb through his fingers and said "got your nose" the baby laughed. the cops then burst down his door and arrested him for robbery of personal items. they werent laughing.

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Schroedingers cat walked into a bar... and it didnt.

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Why haven't the Miami "Big Three" won a championship together? They don't play as a team. They rely on three people to score all their points when there are at least two other people on the court at all times. They jinxed themselves because they thought they were going to win every title until their contracts were up.

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Q: What do you call a black preist? A: Father

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Q: Why did the rich Wallstreet business man move into Harlem? A: Because sex offenders weren't welcome anywhere else.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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Q: What has four legs and an arm. A: A pitbull on a playground

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What do you call two black men kicking a ball? Soccer.

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Nohypocondrism: When you feel fine and everyone keeps telling you you are a sick bastard. Charisma: Hey, that guy that changed my life killed the neighbor, cool rite? I mean that damn neighbor did say nothing to me when I said hi. Solitude: When the room is so overcrowded that you feel small and alone. I think that people that are jack of all trades and master of none are stupid... I AM JACK OF NO TRADES AND MASTER OF ALL! I am nothing, because nothing lives on forever, nothing is unbreakable, nothing is really awesome on a terrible day... I am also Nobody, because Nobody has more money than me.. FUUUUUUUU..

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What did the abortion say to the womb? I'm outta here.

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Why did the farmer go to the market? Because his butt was on fire!

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Knock Knock Whos there? I dunno I didnt answer the door

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42

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how do you make a orange juice. get orange juice and pour it in a cup.

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what did the mexicans name their daughter? nothing. they were deported before they had a chance

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ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, I LOVE YOUR MOMA CAUSE SHE STINKS OF POO :) BY VICKY CASSIDY, RENATA SZABO, ELLA AND HEIDI MCMILLAN

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what's red and blue? your heart

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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