Why did the mother have a club in her hands covered with red liquid? She spilled her bloody murry while playing golf.

What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

What happens when you shoot a priest in the heart? He dies.

What's white or grey or brown or green or black or yellow or purple ? Could be almost anything, really.

Knock, knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest!

Q: If Jack Bauer is partially gay, then what are you? A: His sidekick -Ryan Vallee

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

tried to think of a great "anti-joke" not creative enough

What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

Scientist 1: "What's your research paper about?" Scientist 2: "Homosexuality in fruit bats." Scientists 3, 4 & 5: "AHAHAHAHA LOL WUT"

Roses are Grey Violets are Grey lolololol Im a dog

What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

AVB

What did Don King do with his new boxers? Put them on with a respectable pair of trousers.

A white man walked in da hood aaand he never came back

What is the square root of 69? 8.30662386

Heartlight

An Englishman, an American, and an Australian walk into a bar. They speak English to each other.

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

Why couldn't Mike answer the phone on time? On his way to the phone he was shot and killed.

how long does it take for a black woman to poop? women dont poop, especially not halle berry

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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