Why did the chicken cross the road To get to the other side

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

How do you get a one armed man to fall out of a tree? Wave.

Do the Helen Keller... become mute, deaf, and blind.

Roses are ??red Vilotes are ????blue I am single and now so are u???? no go move on I don't need u I have some weed and I'm willing to kill u

What do you call 10,000 black men with their heads sticking out of the ground? Afro-turf

What happened when the joke was bad? crippled up like cancer of the eye

why was the old woman angry? fig pudding.

There are two types of people in the world: humans

?ti saw won troffe eht htrow t'nsaw yllaer siht

What did the man do when he walked into the gym? Died of a brain aneurysm.

How do you kill yourself You jump of a cliff

A terrorist walks into a bomb shop. He soon realizes he's in the wrong shop, leaves and goes on with his day.

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The Police then give the S.W.A.T team the signal, and bust down the door and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door is Carlos Pedrojeuz, a serial killer, meth addict who has been a part of the sex slave trade for a decade. One might think of answering the door next time.

how many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? well it depends on the size of the bathtub - and the size of the babies, for sure.

What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

Wanna hear a joke? Sure Niiiiggggeeee what is the last letterThe last letter is NOT and R! Its an R. Good job honey

A priest, rabbi, and mormon are arguing about which religion is best. A zookeeper hears and says, "I have a bear who is sleeping right now. How about whoever converts the bear belongs to the best religion?" The priest goes in first, and then walks out a few minutes later, unharmed. The mormon does the same, and he too exits unscathed. The rabbi goes in, and walks out covered in claw marks. "How'd it go?" Said the zookeeper. "Easy." Said the priest. "I just sprinkled some Holy water on him." "I did the same." Said the mormon. The rabbi looked at the zookeeper and said, "have you ever tried to circumcise a bear?"

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the the wheels.

What did the mute person say to the deaf person? Nothing.

Women.

Knock Knock Who's there? The visitor is deaf and therefore does not have the ability to respond.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has been sexually abusing 6 for all his life

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...