What time does lunch usually begin on the other side of the world. Noon.

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As Vanilla Ice once said, "If there's a problem ill resolve it."

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Why did the boy drop his Ice cream? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him.

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A priest, an iman, a rabbi, a bishop and a Dalai Lama walk into a bar. Because they were of different faiths, racial slurs were thrown back and forth until they all left. They spent the rest of the night and most of the following day unhappy.

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Canada AYY

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what's retarded and has red hair? You. ;)

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whats worse than your little sster being raped? her being raped by your father.

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what's big fat and hairy yo mamma

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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what do you call a black man being hung from a tree? -prejudice

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A mama cow was sitting in the barn with her 3 babies. The first baby cow goes "Mom, why did you name me Daisy?" "Because a Daisy landed on your head when you were born" The second calf goes "Mom, why did you name me Rose?" "Because a Rose petal landed on your head when you where born." The third calf says "Aasdfghoiuytfghjkuiy" The mom replies "Shut up brick"

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I got it Nero, lets just be friends for now and forget about the work I do here and you there.

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Knock, knock (No one was home)

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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What do you call 99 lawyers in a car going off a cliff with no driver and another lawyer running in the other direction? A dick move.

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two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because I can tell by your accent.

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I have a sandwich and chips for lunch! But instead of a sandwich I have macaroni, and instead of chips I have no friends.

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What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

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Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot had a seizure.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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