Why did the Chicken cross the road? He was on his way home from work and saw some youths loitering on the street corner and thought it best to avoid them and therefore any possible confrontation. He would also appreciate it if you would call him something along the lines of Bravery impaired instead of a chicken as he finds it offensive and doesn't fully understand the avian reference to his lack of confidence.

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What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Jason. Jason wh-(death sound when being cut by chainsaw)

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What do you call a deaf black man? Well, if you did not already know his name, you would first have to contact a member of his family, or a friend, and ask them, as even if you were able to communicate the question of 'what is your name?' to the man, it is well known that the speech of deaf people is nowhere near as clear as that of people who are able to hear.

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Q. What happened when a mouse ran up the clock and it struck 12? A. It fell off and got raped by an 80 year old Asian lady with breast cancer

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How do you find Will Smith in a snowstorm? You look for the black guy.

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Why did the world not end in 2012? Because the Mayans were drunks.

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How do you starve a blonde? You tie them up and deprive them of any food.

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Why did the kid stop going to school? His alarm clock broke.

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What's brown and sticky? The british econonic system from 2 May 1997 to 27 June 2007.

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Q) what's black and white and red all over? A) a slaughtered zebra.

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kyle dosnt eat dick...

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Black History Month

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Why don't people like this joke? It makes no sense.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Having lost his job, wife, and general sanity, he resorted to suicide by car accident.

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What's worse than finding a Holocaust in your apple? The worm

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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"Hello?" "Is your refrigerator running??" "Yes..." "Oh. Well then have a nice day."

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What's worse than being hit by a mini van? Being hit by 5 mini vans.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Europe Europe who? No, I'm not, you're a poo!

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what smelss like crap.... CRAP dose DUH

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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A white guy, a black guy, and a Spanish guy jump off of a building. Due to acceleration of gravity, they hit the ground at a fast speed and die.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? Because it wanted to be a monkey? Why did the John fall out of the tree? Because he has no arms and legs because he suffers from a severe case of lepracy. Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by three monkeys, a fridge and a boy with no limbs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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