Why did the girl fall off a cliff? Because it was an Anti-Joke.

roses are black violets are too im colorblind how about you

What did the Asian bookkeeper say to the Jewish dog? I love you

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

When life gives you lemons, find someone with a papercut.

What did the dying boy get for Christmas? Presents

Knock, knock. Who's there. Death.

What's the difference between a pancake? They both taste good with jam

what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

Whats funnier than a Dead Baby in a bathtub? Nothing Thats as good as it gets!

Why didn't the blind girl say hi to anyone? Because she was blind.

How did the dragon get AIDS? He had sex with an HIV positive dragon months prior.

Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

Yo mama's so fat that she took a look at her life and realized she wanted a change so she joined a dieting group and started eating better and exercising more and she got down to her goal weight and now looks and feels better than ever it's very inspirational, good for her.

Roses are angry Violets are too My head is scratchy I need shampoo

- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

Yo momma's so dirty that she washes her hands with anti-bacterial soap.

What did the girl with no hands get? Gloves.

Billy's alarm clock went off at 8:00 AM but Billy was really tired but still his Dad forced him to go to school.

How do you push a blond off a cliff? Push here.

what did the american say to the other american? get out of the way i gotta go to mcdonalds!

What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

Why did the man drink his own piss? Because he was Bear Grylls

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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