why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

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Knock Knock Who's there Bannana O He lives next door

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So, I was eating out this girl Until I tasted something like horse semen. So I looked up at her and said; " Ah grandma, so that's how you died ! ".

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I was going to tell my mom an anti-joke. Then she died.

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What do you call a cow in the grass... A cow in the grass... Dumbas*

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knock, knock. come in.

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what's worse than finding a fat couple in a buffet?

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Girl-Does this dress make me look fat? Boy-Hell yea you do, wait, let me speak your language...... Cows go MOOOOO -Ryan V

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What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

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Murder me once, shame on you.

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How did Bob fall off the swing? He had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? He had no arms. What did Bob get for Christmas? Cancer.

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How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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Q: Why did the singer stop singing? A: Someone threw a car at her face.

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Ay Bee Cee Dee Ey Ef Gee Haych Eye Jay Kay El Em En Ow Pee Queue Our Es Tee You Vee Doubleyou Ex Why Zed Now you know your ABC, come along and sing with me!

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wanna hear a joke? asians with t i t s

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women's rights

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Osama Bin Laden and a monk walk into a bar. Mistaken Identity. It was the Dalai Lama, Osama is dead.

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what language does the turtle speak? i dont know I'm not a turtle.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple...

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What do Molly and Sharon have in common? They both annoy me.

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A horse walked into a bar. Animal control was immediately called and the horse was returned to it's original owner.

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What's funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitch-fork

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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