A priest and a rabbi walk into a strip club. They then realised that they are religious leaders and set an example for their respective religious communities and shouldn't be in a strip club and leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock Knock Get off my property or I'll call the cops on you!- Napoleon Dynamite

thumb_up thumb_down +9

If I had a gun with only 2 bullets, and was in a room with Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and you; i would shot Hitler and Osama because they committed terrible crimes

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I was visiting my grandad the other day and my phone died, I was really bored, he told me I rely too much on technology I replied with 'no you do' and Unplugged his life support

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happened to Emma? I raped her!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a black man with no education? An unfortunate outcome of our meritocratic society.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

knock knock who's there? rock rock who? rock on the ground, don't trip

thumb_up thumb_down +7

sdasdadasdasd

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

thumb_up thumb_down +7

When life throws you melons you might be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what do a plane and a mouse have in common? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What do you call a Deer with no eyes? A: No ideer. Q; What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? A: Still no ideer.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A fat guy walks into a bar and the bartender says, "the regular?" The fat man replies, "actually this time I wanna try something different."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Where did the Welsh man work? At an office complex.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man is so drunk that the alcohol has a biphasic effect on the body, meaning that its effects change over time. Initially, alcohol typically produces feelings of relaxation and cheerfulness. Increased consumption, however, can lead to dehydration, coordination problems, blurred vision, and a great number of health, medical, and social issues and other drinking problems caused by alcoholism. As articulated above, excessive alcohol consumption can lead to drunkenness. One of the short term effects of intoxication is the lowering of an individual's inhibitions. As a consequence, when people are intoxicated they frequently do things they normally would not do while sober, often ignoring legal, ethical, social, and moral or religious norms. While blurred vision, slurred speech, dehydration, and coordination can be labeled as "alcohol short term effects," other health problems such as alcohol related heart disease, liver disease, and cancer, on the other hand, can be labeled as long term effects of alcohol abuse and alcoholism. This, however brief, is an overview of the effects of alcohol. What remains to be discussed, however, is what Paul Harvey calls "the rest of the story." Essentially, "the rest of the story" is a more detailed analysis of how excessive alcohol affects an individual's life and the lives of those around him or her when the person becomes an alcoholic and suffers from alcoholism. Perhaps the most logical way to discuss this complex topic is to focus first on the classic alcoholic behaviors and effects of alcohol in the four states of alcoholism; then examine some of the "social effects" of alcohol and alcoholism and finally, discuss the medical conditions, health issues, and drinking problems that are caused directly or indirectly by alcoholism.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is your favorite joke? I like bar jokes. Okay knock knock Who's there? A bartender A bartender who? A bartender walks into a bar but before he went through the door, he decided to knock on the door because this lame joke is so random.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What a russian says to another russian? I don't know, but it must be somthing in russian.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is hotter than two girls making out? The Sun.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

My name is never spelt right so its all good

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because he was a pussy.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why is John gay? Because he enjoys the penis

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops