How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Throw a brick at him.

How do you wake up lady gaga? Set an alarm for an appropriate time

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and is therefore ineligible for a driver's license.

a blind man walks across a road. he's dead

What did the one legged girl do when her apartment caught on fire? She tried to hop to safety, but died of smoke inhalation.

Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

What did Hitler say to the lady right next to him before the both committed suicide? I don't know, I don't understand German. I also wasn't there.

Why did the boy fall down the stairs Because I pushed him

A: Knock Knock! B: Come in!

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas Mittens

An asian loses to you in starcraft..

why do blonds write TGIF toes go in first

Why did Susie fall off the swing - because she had no arms Knock Knock Who is it Not Susie

Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

what's more funny then being raped? not being a minority!

Knock knock Who's there? Hurry up, let me in! Hurry up, let me in, who? *gunshot*

GOOD AFTERNOON KIND SIR OR MADAM THIS IS THE KUNDALINI EXPRESS MAY I TAKE YOUR ORDER

What did timmy fall off the swings? He had no arms

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on the front porch? Matt What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a hole? Phil What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating down the river? Bob

why did the dog go inside the church? cuz the door was open.

A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

Never tell Alzheimer's jokes to old people. They will not remember them.

What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...