How do you make a mother at the playground cry? You steal her 3 year old daughter

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Why didn't the monkey fall out of the tree when someone threw a refrigerator at it? Because it was already lying on the floor dying of AIDS.

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What did the the Priest do to the young alter boy? Blessed Him

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Two men are sitting on the couch watching sports, the first man farts, the second chuckles. They continue watching their program.

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Why didnt the black man run the marathon? He was in jail

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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the

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Why did the jew pick up the unicorn lying on the sidewalk? Because he dropped it.

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Why you so fat... Because you have an eating problem fatass...

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a women. Statutory rape.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he fell off a cliff

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Guess What? What? The gludeus maximus of an avian farm bird

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Why didn't the blonde make it in a gun circle? The blonde yelled "Fire"

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What should you do if you are locked in the trunk of a car? Yell for help.

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Seth stock has a large penis

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

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What's the difference between Hitler and shit? Shit has a shower in the morning.

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Knock Knock Hows there Theres no time for this you have AIDS

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What's stupid and a waste of time? Anti joke .com because people on here are too ignorant and serious cuz it's not funny. It's anti joke G-Dang it. Come on seriously

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roses are red violets are blue i dont give a damn how bout you

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After dinner, my girlfriend told me that we should go to my room to play with eachother's toys. It was very fun, I've always enjoyed the plastic dinosaur she decided to bring over.

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A muslim gets on a plane. He is then flown to his destination.

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whats da difference between a black people and grass. there both black except for the grass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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