what did the man do when he went to save the other man from drowning? drowned with him...

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Im going to france... Why To get french fries! Have fun Im back with a $10000bill to pay Wheres the fries Shit

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Would you like a better house, car, spouse, and a better life all together? No, no thanks.

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Roses are red voilets are blue,you are gay so fuck you,!

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had just been brutally raped by a lawnmower. The lawnmower had been hit by a car. The woman driving the car was suffering from Alzheimers disease. Which then escalated from the stress of the accident that she took her cat and ripped his right ass cheek then continued on with her day

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because he was a pussy.

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What do Bear Grylls drink under breakfast? Tea.

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What did Connor say to the fat man? Dude ur extremely fat.

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What's harder than nailing a baby to a tree? My penis whilst im doing it.

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What's green and has wheels? A snow flake. I lied about the wheels, and the color.

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Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

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A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

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why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

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Joe Biden

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Your mother is so unintelligent that her IQ score is equal to or lower than 2 standard deviations below the national average of 100 on the Mensa approved intelligence test that has been properly administered and supervised.

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Why doesn't business go well for pizzeria Vesuvio? Their chef has been dead since many years.

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You have been brought down to hell where you are welcomed by satan. "Welcome to hell, where you watch your loved ones get tortured for all eternity" Satan said "Where is everyone? " you ask "Hmmm, I guess you were never really loved"He replied

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, you should be a con artist.

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Why did the Muslim get on the plane in New York? To go visit his dying aunt in Memphis.

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What's the difference between a duck and a belt? One floats in water and I don't remember the rest but you are a whore.

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What do dead people think when they die? Nothing,they're dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops