Anything Dane Cook says

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Today I looked at a clock and realized that I was late.

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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How many aborigines does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They have no idea what electricity is.

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what is light brown and looks like sand? sand

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Why did the little boy and the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because they were dead.

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126

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Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

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Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

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What did the latino say when he was struck over the head with a shovel? "ouch"

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Why did they name the cat Salty? I have no idea, ask his owner

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How full could a skeleton's stomach possibly be? Replete with perceptible emptiness.

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Evolutionarily destined to be eaten by a predator such as a wolf or coyote, barring haing a defense mechanism that allows it to fend off such attacks.

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What did Brielle say when she fell off the swing? Ow.

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Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

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Allie said yesssssssss!

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Your computer runs so slow that I had to run a virus scan.

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Q: What do you call a fly with no wings. A: Dying.

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What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The colour of their skin.

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? -taken care of. by: Calee^_^•

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On a scale of Voldemort to Nigel Thornberry, how large is your nose?

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Who's this Jesus, have you heard of him?

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Two computers walk into a bar I forget the rest

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The term "serial killer" is a bit strong...i prefer "ghost manufacturer"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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