Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

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Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

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What does a homeless man eat for Thanksgiving? Half of a big mac he found in the dumpster

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A. Four gay men walked into the bar there was one stool left what did they do? B. They flipped the chair upside down By grant c

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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Who's white and tries his best? Steve Nash

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Good guess!

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Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

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LIE

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A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Sgt. Richard, here... your son was raped many times by Iranian soldiers, then forced to make love to many goats and had his limbs chopped off.. he will never be able to walk, talk or poop without assistance again. OH MY GOD, NO!.. WHY!!! Haha just kidding mam, he stepped on a landmine and died.

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man? Melanin!

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why didnt anyone like matt adams? cuz hes a stupid buttface

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A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender felt bad and gave him $20.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? Possibly because it saw some sort of reason to do so, and being a chicken. Doesn't see the danger in motor vehicles.

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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What's the difference between Skittles and black people? ...I like Skittles.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 had 3 testicles

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A man decides to commit suicide and jumps from the highest building in New York, he dies instantly on impact... the day was septermber 11th 2001, either way it was the end for the man

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what did the ninja say to the watermelon nothing that was chuck norris's watermelon

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A black man walks into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder. The bartender asks "Where did you get that?" The monkey replies "Africa, there are thousands of them."

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What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

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A black man enters a bar. The bartender approaches him, and asks "who will it be?" The black man pulls out a gun and robs the bar, he is then arrested ten days later.

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops