A man spills his his drink. Like any other man would do, he got some paper towels and some mult-purpose cleaner and proceeded to wipe up the mess. Not a further word was said about the situation.

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Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and stink.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, Flappy Bird is no where near as annoying as you!

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped

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Why did hitler commit suicide He looked at his gas bill

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the car.

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What is long and black? Some umbrellas.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she went to Seaworld and a whale saw her, looked away, and continued on with its daily life.

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If you challenge the tarsier to a staring contest, it wouldnt undersand a word you say, but it would stare at you when you would think that was apropos. the tarsier wouldnt really think anything and would just make a peepee

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You know what really grinds my gears? Shifting into "park" before my car's fully stopped.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had just been brutally raped by a lawnmower. The lawnmower had been hit by a car. The woman driving the car was suffering from Alzheimers disease. Which then escalated from the stress of the accident that she took her cat and ripped his right ass cheek then continued on with her day

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a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

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Q. Why did Mary fall down the steps? A. Because she had no legs.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor's office? He had brain cancer.

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Knock, Knock... Who's there? Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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why did the chicken cross the road cause he was suicidal but a car just didnt happen to hit him.

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How did the priest die? Masterbation

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Knock knock, Who's there? To get to the other side

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

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i cannot get my penis to rise to the occasion, it is the holocaust tho..

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Your mother is so unintelligent that her IQ score is equal to or lower than 2 standard deviations below the national average of 100 on the Mensa approved intelligence test that has been properly administered and supervised.

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a dog walks into a drug store and orders a bone. what does the cashier do? she wakes up.

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What did the American say to the Russian? Hello, but the Russian did not understand

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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