the

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the jew pick up the unicorn lying on the sidewalk? Because he dropped it.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why you so fat... Because you have an eating problem fatass...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The world's smartest man walks into a bar. And he orders the best most reasonably priced drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock Knock Hows there Theres no time for this you have AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why didn't the blonde make it in a gun circle? The blonde yelled "Fire"

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Seth stock has a large penis

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the prostitute get after sex? Syphilis... she got syphilis

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he fell off a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man walks into a bar and talks with his friends. One of his friends said " Hey, who farted?" When the bar closed, Joe realized it was he who farted.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a women. Statutory rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A king's son's birthday came one day and the king asked what he wanted. "You can have anything in the world son." He would say. The prince answered,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." So for his birthday he got a rollar costar, a new car, a water park, a castle, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. The same answer went out of his mouth for three years. One day the prince was driving in his car, and he got into a terrible car accadent. And while he was in the ER and saying his last words, his father asked,"Son, before you die, i must know, why did you want purple ping pong balls for your all of those birthdays?" And the prince said,"Well I wanted them because-" and then he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A muslim gets on a plane. He is then flown to his destination.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

whats da difference between a black people and grass. there both black except for the grass.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

roses are red violets are blue i dont give a damn how bout you

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's stupid and a waste of time? Anti joke .com because people on here are too ignorant and serious cuz it's not funny. It's anti joke G-Dang it. Come on seriously

thumb_up thumb_down +16

After dinner, my girlfriend told me that we should go to my room to play with eachother's toys. It was very fun, I've always enjoyed the plastic dinosaur she decided to bring over.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you starve a celebrity? Tell them they're fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why can't Sally ride a bike? Because Sally's a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops