Why did the baby start crying? Its mom slapped it in the face, causing permanent brain damage that would haunt it throughout its life.

Why was the teenage girl crying? She wasn't, she was just experimenting with her emotions.

conrad profit

What time is the dentist appointment? Time for you to get a watch

Jack and jill Went up the hill To go smoke Some marijuana Jack got high Unzipped his fly And asked jill "Do you wanna?" Jill sais "yes" Pulled up her dress And things got real fun But silly jill Forgot the pill And now they have a son

Q: why are black people good at basketball? A: because they practice

Why did the dog run away from home? Because dogs are absent-minded and they don't know any better.

Q:What did grandma get for christmas? A:a coffen

only downer about having sex in the dark is........................ when u look out window and guy u thought u were sleeping with waving and laugh

what did the american say to the other american? get out of the way i gotta go to mcdonalds!

thumbs up!

What did the innocent little girl get for Christmas? Lymphoma.

- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

wanna hear a joke: women's rights

Knock knock! Who's there? The police. There was a severe accident not long ago. Your family are dead.

Q:How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could would A: 26

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

When life hands you lemons, Squeeze them in the eyes of children

hi

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? -getting raped by 10 very hung men who go balls deep

What is sad about a kid dying in a bus accident? The other 20 survived

why did the man jump off the building? to commit suicide.

What looks like a jew, smells like a jew, but claims he isn't jewish? Fletcher Phillips

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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