How much does a mexican immigrant get paid? Less an minimum wage.

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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What's big and fat? An obese man.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs floating in the water? Nothing, because he would drown from his absence of limbs.

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What's the difference between a pancake? They both taste good with jam

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What did one duck say to the other duck? Nothing, ducks cannot talk.

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Why did kurt cobain kill himself? He was experiencing heavy depression

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? In a desperate, but unsuccessful attempt to save his mothers life, as a serial killer pulled her into his van

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What is the difference between a car and dead babies? The car is legally obtainable by law and can run on gasoline, when dead babies are nonliving humans, and the owner of which would most likely be sent to jail.

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A baby crawls into an abortion clinic.

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What did the Black guy say to the White Rapper? I really like your music.

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A man runs over a woman with his car, whose fault was it? The woman's for trying to cross the street in the dark without a crosswalk.

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If she's old enough for jail, than shes old enough to rail.

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so one day i was getting my daughter artemisia ready for school and so i came in her room and got her pants and so i put it on and then i said did you grow during the summer really did you and then she said daddy both of my feet are stuck on one side of the leg

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" Hey you have something on your face. " ( man speaking punches the guy he was talking to ) " It was pain."

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call 803-389-9808 for a good time ;D

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If one of us goes, all of us go. If we all go, none of us are left out.

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What is long and black? Some umbrellas.

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What did the Vampire say to the pastor? Nothing. You have to be real to talk

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Whats the best way to get a woman to sleep with you? Rape her

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Why do dogs lick their balls? Why? Because they can.

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What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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Two Japanese men walked out of a bar. They drowned.

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This schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson. She scored poorly from her lack of practice and experience and was turned off from the sport.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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