Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he is Jewish

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

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How Long Is A Chinaman's Name

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what's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? the holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? three bee stings.

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A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

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whats white, and stinks of urine? nick griffin's toliet

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Why was the woman terrified of being screened by the TSA? Because she's embarrassingly obese, liked most Americans.

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What do you call a black piano player? You call him a pianist who plays a black piano. However, that really doesn't seem all that short, so you may just want to call him by his name, whether it be Bob, Jeff, or Ronaldo.

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Knock knock who's there? A serial rapist, now open up. hmmm... Ok... 3 Days passed before they found the serial rapist dead.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

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What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

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Why did they name the cat Salty? I have no idea, ask his owner

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Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

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Why did the little boy and the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because they were dead.

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Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? - I dont know man, but you're adopted.

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why is thus joke stupid? because it is! deal with it!

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how do you make a baby cry? throw bricks at his face.

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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A Man walks into a bar, he sits down on a stool and begins to cry. Why are you crying, asks the Bartender. I just lost my job, my wife left me and I had my car reposesed. Ok says the Bartender, I know what'll cheer you up, he promptly pulls out a 12 inch piano and begins to play. The Man at the Bar says, hey thats awesome where did you get it? The Bartender says, a really old Genie gave it to me. You know what, I like you so I am going to let you have my last wish. Really? Asks the man, Ok thanks, I wish for a million bucks said the man at the bar. There was a Loud voice saying "Your Wish has been granted" then the room was full of ducks. Hey! Exclaimed the man, I didn't wish for a million ducks, I wished for a million bucks! Yeah, said the bartender, and I wished for a 12 inch penis...

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ethan skov ex gf looked like a bull mastifs ring piece

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patient: Doctor, It hurts when I go like this. doctor: Don't do that.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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