Why is an elephant large, grey and wrinkled? Because if it was small, round and smooth it would be an aspirin.

What do a ginger kid get for christmas ? it dusen't matter... gingers don't have souls.

What did the Asian man do when he got lost in the desert? He ate his arms.

why did i fall? i got pushed!

How do you make a girl wet? Throw her in the pool

Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a blonde? A: One, if she tries to swallow it.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? heart worms

Three people are stranded on an island. They are captured by a tribe of cannibal natives. The natives say " find 10 fruits of the same kind and bring them back" The first guy comes back with apples The natives say " shove them up your buttox without showing any sign of emotion" The firs guy gets to the second apple and then woos in pain the natives kill him The second guy comes back with blue berries he gets to the ninth berry and laughs. The natives kill him. The two guys are in heaven. The fist guy says " you could've survived why did you laugh?" the second guy replies," I saw the third guy coming back with pineapples"

Knock knock. Who's there? Dr. Dr who? Dr Johnson. I'm afraid you have AIDS.

as i unscrewed my belly button and suddenly my butt fell off

What is the funny thing about suicide? nothing...

Knock Knock Hows there Theres no time for this you have AIDS

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

What do Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston have in common? They were both great singers.

What's ur favorite color? Cancer Made by mark

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didnt have arms

Your mom is such a slut, she had unprotected sex at least once.

Take my wife- to the store.

Knock, Knock Who's there? A robber who will most likely kill you along with anyone else who will ruin their chances of becoming more wealthy off your most prized possessions.

A man walks into a bar and talks with his friends. One of his friends said " Hey, who farted?" When the bar closed, Joe realized it was he who farted.

Siblings are like sharks, they usually stop biting you when you stab them in the eyes

Ay Bee Cee Dee Ey Ef Gee Haych Eye Jay Kay El Em En Ow Pee Queue Our Es Tee You Vee Doubleyou Ex Why Zed Now you know your ABC, come along and sing with me!

What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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