Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

A man walks into a bar, and says "ow."

What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

A bear walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be." The bear mauls his face off and kills several other patrons before police show up and fire three rounds in it's face.

What is brown and sticky? Poop

Roses are gray Violets are gray I am color blind

Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

Comedy.

why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

Never tell Alzheimer's jokes to old people. They will not remember them.

A

knock knock. who's there? ya ya who? dot com

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

A pedophile walks into a daycare

Wanna hear a joke? JORDAN SANDERS IN A RELATIONSHIP.

Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

Seth stock has a large penis

What did the the Priest do to the young alter boy? Blessed Him

Two penguins were taking a bath. One said "pass the soap." The second penguin replied, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?"

Why do black people like Basketball so much? Because it is a sport participated world wide. They just happen to like it too.

Yo mama's so fat that when she stepped on a scale, she saw her ex-boyfrien's phone number!

Frog-why did the chicken cross the road Chicken-dont judge me...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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