Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

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What do you call an African baby?............................................ A Nigglet.

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Q: Why did the singer stop singing? A: Someone threw a car at her face.

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why was little jimmy sad? he had a frog stapled to his mouth why did little jimmy drop his ice cream cone? he got hit by a bus why did little jimmy fall of the swingset? he didnt have any arms what did little jimmy want for Christmas? parents what did he get for Christmas? cancer knock knock whos there? not jimmy

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why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

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Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

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Where does piglet look for Pooh? The hundred acre forest, you creep.

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knock, knock. come in.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he, he's blind.

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Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

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What is big, red, and beats rocks? A big, red, rock beater.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it with an axe.

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What is worse than 20 black men stealing your TV? Having your family die in tragic car accident.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

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A man opens his sock drawer, grabs his socks and puts them on.........He dies 5 minutes later.

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Ham sandwich

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Women's Rights.

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Why are Asians so smart? Because they study

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(Family sat down at table) *Child goes to start a story* - "I have a ginger friend.." Everyone bursts out laughing and leaves the child confused.

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I'm growing tired of all those ADD jokes. I have ADD, and I... ... what time is it?

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What's big and fat? An obese man.

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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What can't taste with a toung, and it's soul never dies? A shoe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops