Why did the baby die? Abortion

What do u call a black rapper who only raps about sex and money? lil wayne

Knock Knock Who's there? No one was there. It was two birds flew into the door and died.

Why did the little girl get a haircut? A; she has cancer.

Yo mama's so fat she couldn't ride on roller coasters with you in Disney world. Sometimes you wish you could share more fond memories with her.

How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night, To find nothing amiss.

Yo mom's so fat, she's overweight !

if a kayak was stuck in a tree with its headlights on, how many pancakes stacked will it take to get to the moon? none because snakes dont have armpits

helen keller's dad put a plunger in the toilet and left it there. helen then went to use the bathroom....

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Thats where the slaughterhouse is.

A Jew and a German walk in a bar. they've accepted their peoples past and learned to move on with their lives

Q:Why did the booger cross the street? A:Because everyone was picking on him

Why are cemetaries gated? Typically, to prevent vandalism and the emotional trama it inflicts on the deceaseds' families.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

save water shower with friends

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

Why did the child laugh at the anti-joke? Because it was funny

Yo momma is so fat, I gave her a cupcake and she enjoyed it.

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? In this situation, the minority.

- How can you call a person, who hasn't got a left eye, a left hand and a left leg? - All right.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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