There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. Just kidding! Redheads arn't real.

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Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: She got hit in the face with an axe

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what do you say when you see a winner weaner

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because ie was glued to the other one. why did the third elephant fall out ot the tree? Because he thought it was a game. why did the tree fall? Because there were elephants in it.

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whats worse than shitting in a urinal??? shitting in a shower

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whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? A naked chinese man jumping out of your trunk to beat you with a crowbar.

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What did the Groom give to his Bride on their honeymoon? Herpes.

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Why is Osama bimladin dead? Because he was a threat to American for many years, and someone finally found him and killed him.

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knock knock who's there? rock rock who? rock on the ground, don't trip

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Why did the 15 year old girl not enjoy her taco? Because the man making her taco was kid napped and replaced with a female that forgot to put cheese on it.

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch."

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Bird jokes are not funny! Crow up!

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Okay, So a Cow, a Lumberjack and a Fireman walk into a bar. The cow asks the bartender, "What kind of milk do you have?" The bartender looks confused and asks," Why would a cow want milk?" The cow replies,"I've been producing milk all my life and I've never had a chance to try it. I'd just like some milk." The bartender replies,"Okay we have whole milk, 2%, and skim milk. What'll you have?" The cow says,"Whole milk, I want the whole deal." The bartender obliges. Next the Lumberjack comes up to the bar. The bartender asks, "What'll you have?" The lumberjack asks for some syrup. The bartender inquiries,"What kind of syrup would you like?" The lumberjack answers,"Pure Maple, imitation, or chocolate. All work for me." The bartender turns and pours a shot of pure maple syrup and turns away. Finally the fireman walks up the the bartender and says, "Can I have a glass of water?" The bartender turn and ask inquisitively,"Why?" The fireman quickly replies,"TO PUT OUT THE FIRE!"...

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What did Death say to Life? "Look, I respect that you waited till after I broke up with Sandy to ask her out, but it's still a little akward for me, so although there are no hard feelings, it's probably better if we keep our distance from each other for awhile."

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I have a crush on my dad.

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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What is black, white, and red, and can't turn around in a hallway? A nun with a spear through her head.

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Why did the old man have only one foot? Sadley, the other one was shot off in World War II and life hasnt been the same for him since.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate sex Especially with you

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conrad profit

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What is worse than 20 black men stealing your TV? Having your family die in tragic car accident.

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What does a dog do in his spare time? Lick himself.

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What's the difference between a BMW and pile of dead babies? I don't have a BMW in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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