Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

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how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? one and a ladder

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Why do women hate getting shot? They die.

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Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

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Whats worst than a worm in you apple? 2 worms in your apple. Whats worst than two worms in your apple? An apple in your Worm. Whats worst than that? I don't know plenty of international tragedies such as plane crashes, and please don't say the holocaust. I was going to say 2 apples in your worm.

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Whats the square root of x^2? Variables cant be gay

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You can buy me a rose, and if I love roses, that rose would make me happy, you can buy me a large house by the ocean, but if I do not like big empty spaces and dislike the sea, it would make me sad. I am no longer sure what would make me happy, so no.

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buttcrack thumbs up

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What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

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What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

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what do you call a middle eastern man on a plane? a passenger.

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A black man walks into a bar. The man behind him ducks.

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Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

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What's the same between a plane a bird and a piece of celery? They all fly except the celery

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A Chinese man walked into a bar. He now has a minor concussion.

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Why did the man go to the barber? To get a haircut

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Johan showering. . . AWK

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Shmellmype. Shmellmype who? HAHAHAHAHA (read out loud)

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what's worse than finding out god isn't real? finding out he is

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What's the difference between my car and a pile of dead babies? You can't eat my car.

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Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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What's worse than having a bad hair day? Vietnam.

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What do you call a guy who hangs around with musicians? A groupie.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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