"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A minor walks into a bar. He's not very good at limbo.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Scientist 1: "What's your research paper about?" Scientist 2: "Homosexuality in fruit bats." Scientists 3, 4 & 5: "AHAHAHAHA LOL WUT"

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A priest, rabbi, and mormon are arguing about which religion is best. A zookeeper hears and says, "I have a bear who is sleeping right now. How about whoever converts the bear belongs to the best religion?" The priest goes in first, and then walks out a few minutes later, unharmed. The mormon does the same, and he too exits unscathed. The rabbi goes in, and walks out covered in claw marks. "How'd it go?" Said the zookeeper. "Easy." Said the priest. "I just sprinkled some Holy water on him." "I did the same." Said the mormon. The rabbi looked at the zookeeper and said, "have you ever tried to circumcise a bear?"

thumb_up thumb_down +40

:O + :P = 69

thumb_up thumb_down +40

I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What happened to boy who fell down the stairs? He died. What happened to the girl who fell down the same stairs? The boy who fell down the stairs hit her down the stairs too and they both died What happened to the man fell down these very same stairs? He got peer pressure and committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What do you say when you take a nasty shit in you friends bathroom? There's some nasty shit in there.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "That's kind of ambiguous..."

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How do you feed a mockingbird? Give it some food.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Q: What did Batman say to get robin into the Batmobile? A: Robin, get in the Batmobile!

thumb_up thumb_down +36

2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What did Helen Keller see on her trip? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +36

what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

thumb_up thumb_down +34

a car drives off a cliff whos driving? an asin woman!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

what did the turkey say on thanks giving? Nothing, he's dead, we ate him!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's another word for a priest? Rapist

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why couldn't the eleven year old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-14 and he was unaccompanied by a mature adult.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He returned it to the crazed gentleman who sent it to him.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Matt Damon

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why didn't the black man drink out of the white water fountain? Because he wasn't thirsty.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: What did Hellen Keller say to the pizza delivery man A: Stop raping me.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops