Q: What did Gaddafi get for Christmas? A: Brain Surgery

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How do you kill a Chinese man? There are many ways, all of which are horrible

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What does shit and fire have in common? Hitler gave both to jews.

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This schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson. She scored poorly from her lack of practice and experience and was turned off from the sport.

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What is the difference between Charlie Sheen and Michael Jackson? One is dead, one is not.

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How do dinosaurs pay their bills? They don’t, dinosaurs don’t have a capital system.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Ebola

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How many rabbits does it take to screw in a light buld? None, it is scientifically impossible for a rabbit to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

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123 Main street

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Cry me a river. then try and build a bridge, fail, and walk away frustrated

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what do get when you blend zebra, a cow and a walrus? A not very good smoothie

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A turkey and a ham walk into a room. The ham says to the turkey "You're a turkey." The turkey in response says, "Yeah, well you're a ham!" They both then get their heads chopped off, as the room they were in was a slaughterhouse.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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What's the difference between a duck and a belt? One floats in water and I don't remember the rest but you are a whore.

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A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

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what did the white guy say to the mexican? mow my lawn asshole

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Why Oscar lives with elephants in a zoo ? Because he's an elephant.

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John Katzenbach were drinking a soda... He is the author of The Psicoanalist

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Why do Christians believe in God? Because he is real.

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What is worse than finding a worm in an apple? The Holocaust

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Why couldn't the young girl play outside with her friends? She was bed ridden with terminal cancer.

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Why did Jack got late to his date? Because he was playing Call of Duty and forgot about the time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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