How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

Watch this summer, as General Jack Ryu, attempts to fight his way across the jungle only known as "The streets" as he seeks to save Mary.Bison from the evil clutches of Master Jamie Ken in this epic written trailer! Jack Ryu: So we are brothers? Jamie Ken: No, I am your failed clone! I spontaneously begin burning from me feet and hands! WHHHHHHYYYY WAS I NOT THE CHOOOOOSEN ONE!!!!!! Mary B: Ryu... He is the fifth! THE FIFTH HAS ARRIVED! Jim "Dan" Daniels: Yes certainly, it is well within my scientific genius to create the fifth, yet my former associate Bob Sagat lost an eye in an explosion... CAN JACK RYU SAVE THE WORLD FROM THE MOST DEVASTATING BOMB IN THE UNIVERSE: THE AKUMA BEFORE JAMIE KEN UNLEASHES IT? CAN JACK RYU... FIGHT TROUGH THE STREETS... AND LIVE UP TO THE FIFTH AND SAVE MARY BISON? ALL DEPENDS IF HE CAN CONTROL HIS INNER CHUN LI! STREET FIGHTER V: rEVOLUTION

WHATS BALCK AND YELLOW AND UNDER WATER? A BUMBLE BEE IN A SUBMARINE.... YEAH YOU BETTER #$%^ING LAUGH YOU HOMO

Why did the black guy cross the road? To save the endangered child from getting hit by a car across the street.

What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

Helen got hit by a bus. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Helen!!

Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

What did the rabbit say to the rabbi? ...RABBITS DO NOT TALK! So then the rabbi said, "In that case you must be a hare!"

2 men shot up a morgue, 16 bodies remain dead

Person 1- your face is a stupid joke Person 2- you're right, because it's not a joke its a face

Waseem is not a funny guy!

What is worse than a bus falling on you? A bus with Mama June inside it falling on you.

What do you call to guys who gave gave each other HIV? Blood-Brothers

What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

How do you get a baby out of a blender? Pour it.

Obama

What did pikachu say when his trainer was murdered? Pikachu.

how much is a microwave full of dead babies? a fridge full of dead puppies.

Two Atheists walk into a bar. A nearby Christian notices this fact and proceeds to slightly preach to both of the Atheists. They then kindly explain that they don't personally believe in God, but respect the Christian's opinion. They all order drinks, and become very close friends, engaging in a long, hateless conversation.

what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

What's the difference between a duck, an engineer, and a leaf? There are many differences between these 3 that I will not list them all.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas Mittens

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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