Knock knock. Who's there? Dr. Dr who? Dr Johnson. I'm afraid you have AIDS.

What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating

SCUBA is spelt S C U B A

What's small, cold, and lifeless? A dead baby.

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stranded on a desert island for a few weeks. They get to know each other really well.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 3

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs sitting on a bench? Nothing. Why would you harrass a guy with no arms and no legs.

Three facts 1. You are reading this. 2. You realized that is a stupid fact. 3. You are leaving because this was a stupid joke.

Whats red and hurts when you bite into it? A brick.

When do scientologists go to church? When they are done looking at porn.

Roses are red, Violets are VIOLET!

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What did the the Priest do to the young alter boy? Blessed Him

knock knock.. who's there? ted? ted, who? STOP f***ing around, you got cancer!

What did the black man get on his SAT's? -Barbecue sauce

BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None, now stop hallutinating about wood chuck.

How do you prevent aids? Nail an orphan to your genitals before sex.

How can you tell if a calendar is popular? From stock order lists and also from accounts records.

How much Cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? A lot!

Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt Getting stabbed.

What did the blind man do in the dark room? Nothing, he couldn't see.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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