Why was the blonde crying? Because she just watched her infant get sucked into a jet engine and she was very sad.

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Some dude and his son are driving to school. They get into a car accident so the have to go the the hospital. But when the doctor comes in, the doctor says "I can't oporate on this boy! He's my son!" Who's the doctor? His Mom.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead. Q: Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? A: Because he was stapled to the monkey.

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Waseem is not a funny guy!

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Why do Jews make sure their cars can stop on a dime? So if something happens unexpectedly when they are driving they have a better chance of avoiding a dangerous collision.

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Why did the tree get mad at the bush? It didn't. Bushes are inanimate objects, and so are trees.

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Where's my tractor?

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights

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A horse cantered into a bar.

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What do you call a clock with no hands? Broken.

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Why is amouse afraid of cheese? Because they usually die when they get it

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Poop

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Why did the boy fall down the stairs Because I pushed him

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What's worse than AIDS? Buying the anti-joke book

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because eating raw chicken is just wrong.

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Where do black people get there hair cut? At a hairdresser.

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

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How much carlins does it take to screw in a light bulb? One

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Everybody leaves except Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson never walked out alive

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An owl turns to the other owl. He has to, he can't move his eyes.

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3 dogs, a blue dog, a yellow dog, and a red dog. The owner was a man named Jeff. Now the blue dog was always sad so Jeff named him blue. The yellow dog was always scared so Jeff named him yellow. Now the red dog he was red because he had red fur, so Jeff named him red. One day when Jeff was reading his newspaper, he accidentally hit his coffee and it fell on the floor. Question: What did Jeff do? I don't know.

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Obamacare haters

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What did the man do after he took a bite of his pie? Chew. After that? Swallow. Then? Repeat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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