you will now laugh.

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Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

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What did the baby say to its mother after breastfeeding? Nothing

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What happened to the alligator who waled into a bar? He was killed and skinned by swamp hunters in Louisiana.

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Why did Sally Drop here ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock Knock? *who's there* Not Sally.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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Q: How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Juan

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Yo' momma's so fat, she has an increased risk of cardiovascula disease and may die.

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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A priest, rabbi, and mormon are arguing about which religion is best. A zookeeper hears and says, "I have a bear who is sleeping right now. How about whoever converts the bear belongs to the best religion?" The priest goes in first, and then walks out a few minutes later, unharmed. The mormon does the same, and he too exits unscathed. The rabbi goes in, and walks out covered in claw marks. "How'd it go?" Said the zookeeper. "Easy." Said the priest. "I just sprinkled some Holy water on him." "I did the same." Said the mormon. The rabbi looked at the zookeeper and said, "have you ever tried to circumcise a bear?"

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Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

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Terrorist walked into the bar, all dead, except for a small child. The police came and asked the boy: "Boy, how I survived the blast?" The boy answered: "I'm not a boy, I am broccoli"

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What does Ke$ha feel like when getting up in the morning? Shit because she has a nasty hangover.

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A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

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1:Knock Knock 2:Who's there 1: Your cousin tyler He was then brought in with the rest of the family to celebrate Thanks giving.

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Q: What do you get when you mix a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Person 1- your face is a stupid joke Person 2- you're right, because it's not a joke its a face

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I'm banging your sister.

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how did the man get down the stairs? he walked.

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Why was the white guy eating himself? He was a autocannibal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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