What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

A guy walks into a bar. He orders a coke. The bartender looks at the gentlemen with a little smile and says "Just a coke?"

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I beat my family.

An eyeball walks into a bar and the bartender asks him what he would like. The bartender promptly wakes up in jail because he was caught having a meth lab in his basement.

What is the difference between black people and HIV? They are of a specific ethnicity whom which share specific ideals and background; whilst the other is a virus contracted from sexual intercourse.

What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

what did one mental hospital worker say to the other? Billy your not a mental hospital worker, give heather back her clothes so I can escort you back to your cell.

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

A man is eating a sandwich. He is promptly shot in the face.

What's the difference between a teacher and a train?!? The teacher is a highly-intelligent organism and the train is a large vehicle used in transporting goods over long distances on the ground.

A

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a fish.

What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

Q: What do you give a woman with everything? Nothing. You own nothing to give.

Wanna hear a joke? JORDAN SANDERS IN A RELATIONSHIP.

Poop

McDonald's... Giving people with swag jobs since 1942.

Hitler: Ve shud vork togeza and place stategic bombs overr your island. Castro: You are dead.

What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? heart worms

What can a bench do, that a south African man cant? Support a family. (I HOPE THAT WASN'T RACIST)

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a knife Take off your clothes

One time i ate a hamberger than an hour later i sneezed but i dont think it had anything to do with the hamberger.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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