Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, he was hit by a car.

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What do you get when you mix tea and sugar? sweet tea...

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Girl: what comes after 69? Boy: 70. Girl: no,toothpaste! Boy: ...

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Q: What has 1 eye and half of a pig's snout? A: A pig peeking around a corner.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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I Have a Black Friend

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What do A Canary and a Groundhog have in common? Nothing, Groundhogs can fly, and Canaries can't dig.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An Astronaut.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Stubbing your toe

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Generally one, however, in cases where the light fixture is unusually high, a ladder may be necessary. Some people like having a second person hold the ladder as they climb it. In this unconventional circumstance, it would take precisely two Jews to change a lightbulb. Also, Jews are bad people.

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what did Barak Obama order at Dunking Donuts. a donut

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Mr Webb *Hit keyboard loudly* -...

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what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For a joke.

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When a suicide-bomber when to heaven what did Allah give him apart from 72 virgins? 72 mothers in law.

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Why did the Jewish boy grab his groin? Because he was just circumcised.

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I dumped this chick who was cross eyed. I thought she was seeing other people.

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A blonde is running for her life and sees a sign that says "GO LEFT TO SURVIVE". She goes right and she survives.

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Why did the kid stop going to school? His alarm clock broke.

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waiter there's a fly in my alphabet soup that's not a fly that's a spelling bee

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guess what what? nothing.

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Q: What's different about a boy and a girl? A: Nothing. There used to be a notable difference but nowadays you have to strain in order to tell them apart.

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Your mother is so unintelligent that her IQ score is equal to or lower than 2 standard deviations below the national average of 100 on the Mensa approved intelligence test that has been properly administered and supervised.

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A man walks into a bar and takes his seat. After a minute, someone shouts "133!" and this is followed by a couple of slight chuckles around the room. Later, "57!" is heard from the corner, followed by harsh laughter. After a while, someone shouts "66!" which is met by an uproar of uncontrollable laughter. The man, confused by the evening's events, asks the barmam what is going on. The barman explains, every joke has been told countless times so instead of reciting them, they are numbered and people call out the numbers. The man catches on to this, and therefore shouts "453!" which is followed by a deadly silence, because no one had heard that particular joke before, so 453 was just a number to them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops