What happened to the peanut who went to NYC? Nothing because he was eaten on the plane

Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

There was a peice of lasagna. He knew he tasted great. So he constantly feared for his life.

How do you feed a mockingbird? Give it some food.

what happens during a climax apples

Smart Blondes

there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

Doorbell salesman.

I hate when Harry Potter showers in my Potatoes....

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

What is a man with no arms and no legs on a pile of leaves? A quadriplegic who enjoys the fall.

Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: 9/11 jumpers 200 stories in 5 seconds

Type 2 diabetics

Why can't santa fit down a chimney? No one can

And now, A cow pretending to be a man: Jeff: Alan, are you a cow? Alan: What?! No! Cow: Yah me neither you guys want to go skatebords? *Awkward*

Watch your lips.

whats worse then a baby with out floaties?.......beating your grandma to death with a puppy

Q: "What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?" A: Dr. Dre

What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

Matt Damon

Hey, Texas! Knock knock Texas: Who's there? Ebola

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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