Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Everybody leaves except Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson never walked out alive

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Why did the girl ask her brother for aids? Because her room was a mess

Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

what do you call a middle eastern man on a plane? a passenger.

How do white people screw in light bulbs? They read a manual.

It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

YOLO MAH BROLO

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family of four.

Q: How many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 6 million and 1

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

An Asian teenager bought his first gun, and proceeded to go hunting with his father in the wilderness.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Someone threw birdseed.

Why didn't the black man feed his family? They'd eaten about an hour ago.

Chinese food tastes so oriental sometimes, sort of like asian food

Do you want to hear the best joke ever? Me too!

Women's rights.

Roses are red Violets are blue im a retard dictionary

what red black and white al over? a t.v I was kidding about the red part

You can buy me a rose, and if I love roses, that rose would make me happy, you can buy me a large house by the ocean, but if I do not like big empty spaces and dislike the sea, it would make me sad. I am no longer sure what would make me happy, so no.

What's the difference between Kim kardashian and lebrOn James?? Kim got a ring this year

Why was the girl stupid? She didn't pay attention in school because everyone was making fun of her blonde hair.

I walked down the street. I picked up a quarter. It was shiny. Then I walked to school. I finished school, so I walked home, did my homework, and went to bed. Lesson learned: quadratic formula

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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