i went through your mum like a plane on 9,11

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor's office? He had brain cancer.

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What's a fail with a bowl on its head, a 30 year old, and a 5 year old at the same time? Justin Beiber

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im a straight dude and all the gay dudes at school make fun of me oh wait i wrote that backwards

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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What do you call a man with no heart? Dead.

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he didn't have any arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Jimmy was a Potato.

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Why did the father beat his daughter? To alleviate stress.

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What did the fish say when it hit the wall? "Dam."

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Diarrhea

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roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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what happens when two small children jump into a pool full of pedophiles? They splash around and have fun

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

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Why did the man walk into the bar? Because he wasn't looking where he was going

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What type of vision does an Asian person have? 0-0 because he is blind

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A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

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Why can't Kevin run with scissors? Because he killed himself.

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What's a terrorists Favorite color Orange

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Why did the Black Man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

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I enjoy vagina. While you enjoy penis in your mouth. Just remember God hates fags. :)

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A black guy and Hispanic guy jump off the Empire State Building at the EXACT same time. Who dies first? Who cares?!

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Q: What did one dog say to the other dog? A: "Bitch!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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