What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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What happend when 1 second past after 7:00 am? It was still 7:00 am.

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When does George Harrison take a shit? In the morning

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When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

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Why wasn't the boy at his basketball game? - Because he, his twin brother, and pregnant mother all died in a fatal car accident involving a train on the way their.

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Q: What do you call a dyslexic Irish man with no legs? A: Handicapped

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What do you get when you mix your mom and your dad? YOU!!!

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Anagram.

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What's black and white, and red all over ? A penguin in a blender.

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knock knock who's there? rock rock who? rock on the ground, don't trip

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch."

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How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

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when geese fly in a V patteren why is on side longer than the other? not as many geese on that side

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How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

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why was little jimmy sad? he had a frog stapled to his mouth why did little jimmy drop his ice cream cone? he got hit by a bus why did little jimmy fall of the swingset? he didnt have any arms what did little jimmy want for Christmas? parents what did he get for Christmas? cancer knock knock whos there? not jimmy

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What's the difference between me and a ghost? Ghosts aren't Dolphins!

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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What do you call one lawyer shot dead in the street? Ghandi.

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This is probably how President Obama proposed to his wife. "I don't wanna be Obama self"

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Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

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why?

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this website is the funniest thing i've ever seen, besides everything i've seen that's funnier than it

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Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

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Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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