There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did God say to the snake when the Snake decided to ignore God and just give Eve the apples? Snake what are you doing? Answer me, SNAKE! SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! *DUN DUN DURUDUN! DU DU DUN! *gunshot* Moral: I just hate thumbs ups, and the comments where I omit this receives those horrible green thumbs instead of them sexy red ones, so there goes.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt Getting stabbed.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q. What's worse than 400 babies going down the road at 80 miles per hours in a garbage truck? A. The same babies being dumped into a trash compactor

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

roses are red, violets? are blue, Im not good at poems, tits

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between a Duck and Michael Jackson? A Duck has feathers and goes "Quack quack" and Michael Jackson touches little boys......

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why are black people good at basketball? because they practice

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didnt have arms

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why does Santa go down your chimney? Because he is to retarded to use the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the baby crying? Because a tree fell on its legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

The penn state football administration

thumb_up thumb_down +9

women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

If an atom bomb falls in a town, does it make a sound? Not to most people, as they would be killed in a massive catastrophe that will be etched into their ancestors minds for years to come, not to mention radiation poisoning and deformation.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did Death say to Life? "Look, I respect that you waited till after I broke up with Sandy to ask her out, but it's still a little akward for me, so although there are no hard feelings, it's probably better if we keep our distance from each other for awhile."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between a BMW and pile of dead babies? I don't have a BMW in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why Is Jarrod spencer gay Coz he is

thumb_up thumb_down +7

John is typing... *2 seconds later" John: Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: She got hit in the face with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how do you kill an African baby ? put it in the microwave for roughly 45 minutes

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the 15 year old girl not enjoy her taco? Because the man making her taco was kid napped and replaced with a female that forgot to put cheese on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops