Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I beat my family.

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Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

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Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white Stop stereotyping roses, already.

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A man walks into a bar. Another man walks into a bar.

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Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots. They all miss.

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A small boy called peter got stuck up a tree, a man walks past and said "how did you get up there?" peter replies "i fell"

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

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What do you call an 8 foot anxious priest painted purple named harold? Harold.

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why couldent Hellen Keller drive? Because shes a woman.

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Garry Glitters on here

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A king's son's birthday came one day and the king asked what he wanted. "You can have anything in the world son." He would say. The prince answered,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." So for his birthday he got a rollar costar, a new car, a water park, a castle, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. The same answer went out of his mouth for three years. One day the prince was driving in his car, and he got into a terrible car accadent. And while he was in the ER and saying his last words, his father asked,"Son, before you die, i must know, why did you want purple ping pong balls for your all of those birthdays?" And the prince said,"Well I wanted them because-" and then he died.

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Why wasn't the child swimming? It drowned

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Why did the man have blood on his finger? Because he popped a pimple

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Why did the depressed teenager die? Because he had cancer.

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wnba

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Stop being a centipede

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whats better than 69? doing it with jarads mum!!

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What did the hooker get for christmas? Herpes

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Knock Knock Hows there Theres no time for this you have AIDS

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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whats worse than stubbing your toe? getting a vanarial disease and going insane

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs? handicapt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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