What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

What's the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies? My wife didn't cheat on me in a pile of dead babies.

Why didn't Billy have legs? Because he's a fish.

a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

Whats worse than scraping your elbow and knee? Beheading and disembowlment.

There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

Kerry Katona becomes independent.

This site is easy to upload to...

Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

Why are you reading anti-jokes? ... why are you looking at me like that? I asked you a question, idiot.

Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

where would you hide 100 dead jews in a car the ashtray because they were all cremated

Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

What is black and white and red all over the news paper of someone with tuberculosis

-When is a door not a door? -Never

Q: What do you get when you cross Marvel and Capcom? A: Marvel vs. Capcom.

how do u fit 20 jews in a car? 2 in the front and 20 in the ashtray

Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind. Also, she's been dead for 43 years.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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