What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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My butt!!!!

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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Why did the cookie go to the docter? Because he was dieing of terminal cancer.

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Women.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

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Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

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"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

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:O + :P = 69

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Why we in a Falln tank!!!? Be cause the plane exploded!!!!!!!

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Women's football

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There are two gingerbread men in an oven and the one says " it's hot in here" the other says "holy crap it's a talking cookie!!!!!!!!"

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A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

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Cold camel scrotum.

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

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What do you call a black guy with a fan? An African American male Homo Sapien who is most likely hot and sweaty and is probably trying to create cold air and then reduce how hot they are likely reducing the sweat glands natural instict to create ameliorate of sweat and then make him feel better.

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what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

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Black Veil Brides.

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2 men shot up a morgue, 16 bodies remain dead

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Society.

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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How many prostitutes do I have to kill in order to get an erection? Three.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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