Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why do innocent boys have wet dreams? Cause Jesus sucks.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q: why are black people so good at basketball? A: because the can shoot and steal:)

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What do you call a horse with out ears? A horse with out ears?

thumb_up thumb_down -33

How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why do the cangaroos are weird? cause they have testicles in front and penis back, is real!

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Q.Whats funny about death A.You die

thumb_up thumb_down -47

A cow walks into an Asian bar and asks for a beer. The bartender asks it for I.D. It says "it doesn't matter. I came by horse."

thumb_up thumb_down -57

I got it Nero, lets just be friends for now and forget about the work I do here and you there.

thumb_up thumb_down -63

How did the kid drop his ice he got hit by a train Griffin Cholette

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Why did the homeless man get skin cancer Because he didn't have a home so the Suns rays had been directed towards him For 3 years and he was to poor to purchase Sun screen

thumb_up thumb_down -73

Yo momma so stupid that she went to get a college degree from a community college and along with her education now has a greater opportunity to earn money with that knowledge.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

Whats the difference between an elephant and a tomato. You put tomatos in a salad.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Your mama's so fat that she has type 2 diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Sorry boss

thumb_up thumb_down +52

A man and a dog were sitting on a hill, the dog says to the man "Nice weather we are having today isn't it?" The man then goes insane because dogs can't talk, then later commits suicide from depression caused by his wife leaving him.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Women's Rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Not an anti-joke, but an anti-pick-up-line: How much does a polar bear weight? Not as much as you!

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops