Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The Holocaust. And also cancer.

Me: Hey, Johnny! Do you see that Tree? Johnny: No. Me: Neither do I.

In Soviet Russia ? ??? ??? ????????.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. Ask me if I'm a bush. Are you a bush? No.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

Some dude and his son are driving to school. They get into a car accident so the have to go the the hospital. But when the doctor comes in, the doctor says "I can't oporate on this boy! He's my son!" Who's the doctor? His Mom.

What do you call 10 black people on the moon? A problem What do you call 1000 black people on the moon? A problem What do you call the population of black people on the moon? A huge problem

There was an Englishman, an Irishman and a chest of drawers. The Englishman put a flask of coffee in the top drawer without even looking. Diane hates wrestling.

There once was a rose that was red Violets are blue Knock Know who's there? Man I gotta quit huffing glue

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms. A: Knock knock! B: Who's there? A: Not Sally.

Robert supra not deep throwing kaleb law wrench

Where's my tractor?

What can you eat that comes in all different flavors. Chex mix, I bet you thought it was women but its not its chex mix

What do you call a black man? Jamal

What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

Why did the tree get mad at the bush? It didn't. Bushes are inanimate objects, and so are trees.

Why did the blond do so horribly on the SAT's? She was pulled outside halfway through her testing session by the school janitor who molested and murdered her in the bathroom.

What do you call a clock with no hands? Broken.

Whats a box full of sand? a sandsquare

A man walked into a bar. He ended up in the hospital being treated for a concussion.

Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

Why did Bill yell? Because he stepped on a nail.

What did the black kid get for his birthday? A bike, just what he asked for.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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