Why did Jack explode? He had a sneezier and his army friend Stephan threw a grenade at him because he was scared.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I had a "What would jesus do bracelet" and some kid kicked me in the shin... As i was contemplating on what to do to him, i looked at the bracelet and remembered.... SO I SET HIM ON FIRE AND SENT HIM TO HELL!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

girl: Daddie, what's at the end of a rainbow? Dad: No sweetie, a rainbow is acually just an illusion constructed by the refraction of light white as it passes through a water particle in the stratophere. Acting as a prisom the particle will seperate the different components of light, ordering them by the rank of the light energy and the intencity of it's frequency and wavelength.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you get when an elephant and a penguin have a baby? Dunno, it's seems highly improbable.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

asian, do math

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two penguins are in a bathtub, one penguin asks the other "can you pass the soap?" the other penguin says "what do I look like? A toaster?"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Wow, that makes your name a lot more comfortable to say... Not type, and you seem to be more sensitive than non-red hair girls. Besides its really nice, why do you dye it? Is it like red or ginger?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why can't Sean slam dunk cos he has no arms -•#21

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happens when you mix Fluorine, Uranium, Carbon, and Potassium? NaBrO

thumb_up thumb_down +4

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, a poor african child probably has nothing and is starving to death while you and Chuck debate on how to spend your five dollars.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down +2

penis

thumb_up thumb_down +2

If push pops give life a push, Then isn't your mailbox purple?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except it didn't work for the boy with ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a black man jumping off a bridge? Suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

a man pulled up to a girl in a white van with tinted windows. he told the girl he had candy inside. she got in the van. he then proceeded to rape becasue he was a rapist and that is the lifestyle he choose to have.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

PUDDING

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Are you understanding any of this caboose? I think so, that guy is really a robot and you his boy friend so that makes you.................a gay robot. yes i am a gay robot. -_-

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Both my milk chocolate and my white chocolate are brown. Why? I crapped on my white chocolate.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a man walks into a man walks into a man.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops